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| original work Christine I Steeves Speakman |
That tormented feeling is back
Clenching imaginary muscles
Bitter irritation within the skin
This is how I suffocate
Wedged between thought and emotion
Tearing at the air
Struggling to breathe
A fire in the bowels of my being
Dragging me back under
There is no danger
I won’t die locked within my mind
The only comfort my tears
It’s just normal
Abnormal fear
Escape
Or stay prisoned
It’s too hard
It’s too frightening
Who would I be without
The me
Expected
Accepted
Mustn’t rationalize
Mustn’t think
Don’t
Run
Disappear
Crawl back inside
I shouldn’t write this
It kills the fear
me
***
What is Poetry Starts?
…poems and prose from now back to teen years
…remembering a first writing love
…pumping the creative well yet again
…silencing the internal critic