My Journey: March 27 2014

It started up again last night. A thought which drew my hand to pen and paper and a new…very new…story started.

It actually felt good to scrawl across the paper and not feel any hesitation. I didn’t even rethink the notebook I was writing in…like if I should type this to the computer, get a journal for just this story, use binder school paper, maybe change pens, give a title first, nothing. I just wrote. Granted…no I’m going to leave that word in, it’s part and parcel of my old habits to excuse away the internal editor…no, it’s more the apologetic persona that is excusing my creative ability.

What’s worse…the negative editor or the apologetic persona? Is it better to be negative about what you create than to actually go and apologize for being __________?

Either one holds me back from my first passion…fiction writing. Yes, I’ve found other writing passions, ones I will never give up. Ones I treasure and would be lost without.

But that first passion…it’s very much like your first love – it never dies. It may fade away, but at some point it pops back into your mind. Comes back as a favourite memory or a driving force.

We’ll see what happens next.

8 thoughts on “My Journey: March 27 2014”

  1. Chris, I love free writing. This is what I'm doing right now with my third mystery. Write whatever comes to mind. Don't worry how it sounds or how far out it is. Just write. Let everything come out. You can always edit later in your revisions.

    Nicely put! Reading this was inspiring. Good luck on your story!

    Curl up with a killer – Cozy Mysteries
    The Ginseng Conspiracy by Susan Bernhardt
    http://www.susanbernhardt.com

  2. Interesting comment about a negative editor. I don't look at it as negative, but an editor that gives me the required push for growth. That's positive.
    I'm looking at MS on the back burner. After the learning curve I've been on, they need major work. Thanks muse editors for showing me the light.
    Heather G – The Natasha Saga
    http://heathergreenis.weebly.com

  3. Thank you for sharing this, Chris. Sometimes I find myself paralyzed by what you call the negative editor and the apologetic persona (great names by the way!). When I do, I find that stream of consciousness writing helps me break through.

  4. Hi, Susan, Heather, Matt…thanks for dropping by. I've never planned a story in my life. Every time I do, it doesn't make it to page one. I don't mind my working self-editor, but that internal editor which fights to have every single sentence perfect the first time is a real pain…hence the negative editor name 🙂

    Which I could name characters as easily as I can the internal pains, Matt, LOL. No idea why that apologetic one is there. I'm fine with all my non-fiction (reviews mostly) and editing for Muse. But get to my first love of fiction writing and it's like I'm pulling my head down into my shell to hide.

    Oyyyy.

    Oh, Heather…I have one very old MS where I have sisters, not twins, not adopted, and they're both 18…nope, not a younger or older indicated, just both 18. I should say one's an alien, but thankfully this was written during my teen years…yeah, I was naive LOL

    Again, thanks for dropping by and taking this coward's hand

  5. Hey I needed this today. I just clicked out of my MS in Word because I was in a spot in my WIP not knowing where to go. Instead of continuing to free write, I stopped to plan out the consequences of the situation. Guess I'd better get back to that writing and just "let it go."

  6. Sounds like a plan JQ. Sometimes we really do just have to let the writing…characters, story…go without thinking. Thanks for stopping by

  7. Hey, Chris. Thanks for posting this on the loop. I'll have to follow you here. I get frustrated when what comes out on the screen doesn't come out as perfectly as I expect. LOL It's taken me a while to realize that like James Michener, "I"m not a very good writer, but an excellent rewriter." Well, I'm not an excellent writer, yet, but I'm not as afraid of the rewrites. Just because others can make it come out better sooner, it's all right if it takes me longer. It's like having a problem to fix. I love a good project. Unlike you and so many others. I'm a plotter. Within that plan, I do sometimes just write and am frequently surprised by the direction the story/characters take, but I start with a plan. I have a counselor friend who suggested when I was in that creative mode to have something there to remind me of that–not the time to edit. I plop a small stuff puppy on my computer. Scruffy reminds me to have fun and let go. (Not something I'm terribly good at. He helps.) I'll be sharing.

  8. Hi, Marsha. Glad you dropped by and thank you.

    Sounds like you have a good balance of plot and pantser going. As I've been told and retell…it's all in the edits/rewrites.

    Funny you should mention your stuff puppy. I just took up Lea's challenge to share a pic of our individual writing space and I'm surrounded by items to remind me to have fun and to inspire me.

    Thanks again!

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