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| works by Christine I Steeves Speakman |
We’ve all heard how we need to let go. Let go of our anger, resentment, self-pity, sadness, even grief, whatever it is that grips us at the time. Far easier said than done. How exactly do you “let-go” of something you hold within your body cells?
Where else do emotions live but within us? I feel my emotions in my mind, heart, and gut. They’re not something I can just open and whatever I’m feeling falls away…like a glass falling from my opened hand.
Emotions are too complex.
So, how then do we let-go of any one emotion?
Breathing helps. No, I don’t mean the normal breathing we do without thinking. The one that keeps us alive.
Take the calming deep breathe in through your nose filling your body which then releases just as slowly through your nose. Some people count to five for each section…in, hold, out.
One thing I’ve learned is any emotion causes my body to tense up…tighten whether in total happiness or complete fear. My body goes into hyper-mode ready to pounce in any direction. Laughter has caused the giggles and then hiccups or aching sides because I’m not breathing properly.
Therefore, the first act of letting-go for me is to breathe. Settle my body’s surface reactions, relax the stomach muscles, let my heart rest, and then my mind is freer to think on the problem (which is what causes the emotional reaction in the first place) and find the solution.
The solution of letting-go…hmmm, that has as many sides as the truth. My dad would say the truth is somewhere between my truth and your truth. Letting-go has a few questions to be answered:
1. Is there anything I can actively do to change or rectify the situation?
2. If yes…do I want to?
3. If yes…do I need help in order to change/rectify?
4. If yes to number 3…am I willing to go that route? What are the consequences and are they worth it? Am I willing to accept the consequences?
5. If yes to number 4…then what? See – Letting Letting-go have its moment – as well as – Letting Acceptance have its moment.
6. If no…then we’ll need to visit – Letting Acceptance have its moment – one day.
OR
7. Due nothing and stew in whatever emotion is strangling you.
Why number 7? Well, I’ve never heard of anyone ever wanting to let-go of a positive healthy emotion/reaction. If Love, Happiness, Joy, Peace is beating you down, well then they might not be love, happiness, joy, or peace…or maybe you just have a very different definition of these from what mine are.
Letting-go needs its moment. Every situation which causes a Letting-go moment does so on its own timetable. Let no one tell you when you need to let-go, get over, move on.
Just keep an ear open for your own rising Letting-go moment.